TOSSING AND TURNING

15:45 pm, May 20th

‘How to even comprehend all of the emotions that are building up in the pit of my stomach?’, I googled. I feel like it’s the ‘avoid sad songs at all costs and start listening to some pumped-up songs’ to avoid yourself from being under the weather for so long or it’ll ruin your first day as a uni student. The internet is good like we have wifi here so blessed this university I already like it to the moon and back. But let’s also talk about how I just ‘salam’ my parents and sister goodbye. I had to literally run upstairs to my room and told my roommate that I wanted to sleep where I actually shed some tears over the fact that I have to leave everything behind including my cats ?!? I failed though. I wanted to sleep for a good one hour before we have to go downstairs for a program but all I did was tossing and turning the whole time while my brain doing its work nonstop by overthinking. Please, brain, just for this once, agree with me to shut down yourself for a few hours please I would really appreciate it. and so I did.

11:30 pm, May 21st

To be honest, I never did. I was so tired that I slept early that day. Everything was hard including the fact that my dorm is so far away and the facilitator just had the nerve to suddenly asked us to wear sports shoes so I had to run all the way to the milky way to get my sports shoes. My worse enemy ever. running. because I got sweat easily and I hate being smelly the most especially on the first day when I need to look presentable and approachable but then again we’re all on a same stinky and smelly boat so. Hahahhaha. I have, to be honest, I met a few friends. Correction, crazy friends. Like, super and it reminds me of ain zulaikha basically she is the Ain zulaikha in my college life. Somehow I felt like I haven’t laughed this loud for a long time. So far so good. I was planning on crying myself to sleep that night because when the facilitator said we have to hand them our parents’ photocopy of their ic, I almost cried. Just a picture of them makes me almost cried. but I hold it back.I was too tired to even think of anything and just went to sleep. Oh, btw we have to get ready by 4:45 in the morning tomorrow. So this is my alarm clock for a week

Somewhere around noon, May 23rd

I. DID. MY. LAUNDRY.GUYS. wait till I finish pat myself on the back because it’ll be a long one so bear with it. I can almost hear my mom saying ‘waaahh what a good girrll you did a great job!!’ all the way from Hulu Langat. Just so you know, I didn’t use the washing machine okayy I did all of the cleanings by hand and also dry it by hand. Of course, I hang it by hand too. Suddenly, I miss my washing machine back at home because back then it was so easy. That all I have to do was wait for 30 minutes then it’s good to go. #Cantwaittogohometoclaimmycomplimentfrommom #sisnolongerahandsonlaundrycleaningvirgin

the fact that dad sent a video of my cat (Noir) meowing but his caption is ‘Noir said hi’ literally breaks my heart to pieces. How to not miss your cats though?

#goshimissthemalready

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